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Page 77 of 1081922 · PDF PAGE 64
…ed the whole fuss ; and when I feel like eating gray caviare, I'm going to eat gray caviare. We wolfed it down. It’s silly to think that things matter. Lou danced like a delirious demon between the courses. It pleased her to assume the psychology of the Oriental pleasure-making woman. I was her Pasha- with-three-tails, her Samurai warrior, her gorgeous Maharaja, with a scimitar across my knee, ready to cut her head off at the first excuse. She was the Ouled Nail with tatooed cheeks and chin, with painted antimony eyebrows, and red smeared lips.…
1922 · PDF PAGE 139
…mes from privation. It was only a hint of the horror so far. I had enough of the stuff in me to carry me through for a bit. But, even as things were, it was bad enough. I had a feeling of utter helplessness. I began to repent having repulsed the advances of my fellow prisoners. I approached them and explained that I was a “ Stsgnor Inglese”’ with “ molto danaro” ; and if any one could oblige me with a sniff of cocaine, as I explained by gesture, I should be practically grateful. I was understood immediately. They laughed sympathetically with pe…
1922 · PDF PAGE 145
…d for our courier. He has known Sir Peter since he was a boy at school. The whole thing is shameful and abominable. I don’t see why such things are allowed. The consul seemed in doubt as to what to do. He played with his watch-chain nervously. I had sunk into a chair—I noticed they hadn't offered us chairs when we came in—and the whole scene vanished from my mind. I was aware of nothing but a passionate craving for drugs. I wanted them physically as I had never wanted anything in my life before. I wanted them mentally, too. They, and they only,…
1929 · PDF PAGE 19
…e's advanced ideas had come; but Theodore had stoutly and even a little sternly rebuked him with the original remark: To the pure all things are pure. It was knowing when to be bold that had made Theodore the fine business man he was. And very bold it was, for conscience makes cowards of us all. The secret shame of his orgies! Every week- nightonce even on a Sunday!after everyone had gone to bed, he opened the little safe in the wall at the head of his bed, and drew forth the obscene picture from its envelope marked In case of my death o…
1910 · PDF PAGE 117
…es is he actually master over his senses. The man who is, is able to accom- modate his senses to his mind. To him no longer are external things necessary, for he can stimulate mentally the sensation desired. He can hear beautiful sounds without listening to beautiful music, and see beautiful sights without gazing upon them; he in fact becomes the creator of what he wills, he can exalt his imagination to such a degree over his senses, that by a mere act of imagination he can make those senses instan- taneously respond to his appeal, for he is lo…
1910 · PDF PAGE 117
…es is he actually master over his senses. The man who is, is able to accom- modate his senses to his mind. To him no longer are external things necessary, for he can stimulate mentally the sensation desired. He can hear beautiful sounds without listening to beautiful music, and see beautiful sights without gazing upon them; he in fact becomes the creator of what he wills, he can exalt his imagination to such a degree over his senses, that by a mere act of imagination he can make those senses instan- taneously respond to his appeal, for he is lo…
1911 · PDF PAGE 117
…ltar with his hands, and strike it with his forehead seven times. Now this altar is the earthen altar of Demeter. Then understanding all things by the light of that love, he shall know that this is love, that this is the soul of the earth, that this is fertility and understanding, the secret of Demeter. Nay, (even I) the Oracle may speak in his heart and foretell or foreshadow the greater mysteries of Persephone, of Death the daughter of Love. Those, too, who are thus reborn will understand that I who write these words am stretched on the wet e…
1911 · PDF PAGE 117
…ltar with his hands, and strike it with his forehead seven times. Now this altar is the earthen altar of Demeter. Then understanding all things by the light of that love, he shall know that this is love, that this is the soul of the earth, that this is fertility and understanding, the secret of Demeter. Nay, (even I) the Oracle may speak in his heart and foretell or foreshadow the greater mysteries of Persephone, of Death the daughter of Love. Those, too, who are thus reborn will understand that I who write these words am stretched on the wet e…
1929 · PDF PAGE 22
…ed "What does she do?" (The Countess was supposed to know no English. She spoke it as well as anyone in the room, of course.) "She moves things," he said; "manages to get hold of a couple of hairs when we're tired of looking at foolishness for hours together, twists them in her fingers, and, miracle of miracles! the ball rises in the air. This is everywhere considered by all rightly-disposed people to be certain proof of the immortality of the soul." "But doesn't she challenge you? ask you to search her, and all that?" "Oh yes! You've got the s…
1996 · PDF PAGE 90
…ncipally to two radical errors. 1. The Universe was conceived as possessing a fixed centre, or summit; an absolute standard to which all things might be referred; an Unity, or God. (Mystics were angry and bewildered, often enough, when attaining to “union with God” they found him equally in all.) This led to making a difference between one thing and another, and so to the ideas of superiority, of sin, etc., ending by absurdities of all kinds, alike in theology, ethics, and science. 2. The absolute antithesis between the pairs of opposites. This…
1954 · PDF PAGE 332
…rmined his will, and trace out that in similar fashion, and let this process be continued for many days until the interdependence of all things is a truth assimilated in his inmost being. This being accomplished, let him trace his own history, with special reference to the causes of each event . And in this practice he may neglect to some extent the universal forces which at all times act on all, as for example, the attraction of masses, and let him concentrate his attention upon the principal and determining or effective causes. For instance, …
1904 · PDF PAGE 75
… thecreator of Heaven oD caosgagi, oD faorejita oresa, od tofijilo; od DO uo elonusa od and earth, and the dwelling of darkness, and all things and in their power and lukiftias; oD DO-O0-a-ipe JOrimeumaton Das bojua voresa pooumala brightness; and inthe name Primeumaton who reigns over the palaces peripesol: Bolakame, gobus, gabe i2., Bolakame tot3a ole oanio: of Heaven. Bring forth, I say, the spirit N.; bring him forth in the 24th of a moment * Or Gaap, Paimon, Zodimay, as the case may be. 59
1910 · PDF PAGE 135
…ing consciousness to Simulacrum. God-form Thoth, 16m. Result fair. Akasa-Ak4sa, During the meditation the following Vision was seen. All things around me were surrounded by silver flashes or streaks. But about the human corpse which I saw before me there were fewer, and they moved more slowly. Above me was a pyramid of flashing light, and around me purple hangings. Five silver candle- sticks were brought in, and then I saw a throne with pentagram in white brilliance above it. There was a rose of five by five petals within ; and above Qesheth th…
1910 · PDF PAGE 135
…ing consciousness to Simulacrum. God-form Thoth, 16m. Result fair. Akasa-Ak4sa, During the meditation the following Vision was seen. All things around me were surrounded by silver flashes or streaks. But about the human corpse which I saw before me there were fewer, and they moved more slowly. Above me was a pyramid of flashing light, and around me purple hangings. Five silver candle- sticks were brought in, and then I saw a throne with pentagram in white brilliance above it. There was a rose of five by five petals within ; and above Qesheth th…
1922 · PDF PAGE 30
…id in Balham might take an interest in natives of Tonga, and so she went about with them. Her mother didn’t mind. Probably, too, the way things are nowadays, her mother didn’t matter. You mustn’t think that we were any of us drunk,
1922 · PDF PAGE 284
…sing- gowns sent up from Piccadilly. They sent people round with a selection at once, and what with that and sending out for some toilet things, and having in the hairdresser, we made ourselves fairly presentable by half-past one. That morning gave me the impression of a vaudeville turn or a farce. We had to dodge about from one room to another according as male or female angels ministered unto us. The excitement kept our minds off heroin very successfully ; but it obtruded itself constantly on our notice none the less by insistent physical att…
1922 · PDF PAGE 307
The Voice of Virtue 293 -Satanistic idea of working evil for its own sake; for another, the schoolboy delight in doing things on the sly; then there was the simple and straightforward money lust. Again, my hatred of hypocrisy had turned into a fascination. I wanted to enjoy a taste of so subtle and refined a vice. On the top of this there was a motive which really encroached on the category of insanity. On the one side I was exuberantly delighted to find myself in possession of boundless supplies of cocaine; on the other I was enraged with mank…
1954 · PDF PAGE 285
…aboration of the equal opposites is the first condition of existence in any form. The trouble has always been that nobody ever looked at things from outside; they were always at one end or the other. This is because one haphazard collection of Point-Events chooses to think of itself as a Male; another, as a Female. It is totally absurd to think of Winnie as a woman, and Martin as a man. The quintessence of each is identical: "Every man and every woman is a star." It is only a superficial accident that has made one set determine to function in o…
1922 · PDF PAGE 124
…ad and book your rooms and look after your luggage and engage boats and that sort of thing for you, I shouldn’t need to be explained. As things are, it might even save you trouble. They’re the most frightful brigands round here ; and anything that looks like a tourist, especially of the honeymoon species, is liable to all sorts of bother and robbery.” Well, the thing did seem almost providential ; asa matter of fact, I had been thinking of getting a man
1922 · PDF PAGE 177
…e desperate anguish of our necessity drove him to swift resolute action. He sent for the barber and the waiter. We had the maid pack our things. We paid the bill and left our heavy trunks in the hotel, explaining that we had been called away suddenly on business. We put our dressing cases into a taxi and said, “ Euston, main line.” Cockie stopped the man at Cambridge Circus. “ Look here,’ he said in an eager whisper, ‘‘ we want some rooms in Soho. Some French or Italian place.” The man was equal to the problem. He found us a dirty dark little r…