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Page 49 of 801922 · PDF PAGE 30
… the tremendous psychological experience for which all words are inadequate. Seated by her side, at leisure to look while she babbled, I found my carnal mind reversed on appeal. She was certainly not a pretty girl from the standpoint of a music-hall audience. There was something indefinably Mongolian about her face. The planes were flat; the cheek-bones high; the eyes oblique; the nose wide, short, and vital; the mouth a long, thin, rippling curve like a mad sunset. The eyes were tiny and green, with a piquantelfin expression. Her hair was curi…
1922 · PDF PAGE 41
… my physical body was lifting me. It was the same old, wild exhilaration that one gets from rising from the ground on one’s good days. I found myself in the middle of the floor without knowing how I had got there. I, too, was walking on air. Lou turned, her mouth a scarlet orb, as I have seen the sunset over Belgium, over the crinkled line of shore, over the dim blue mystic curve of sea and sky; with the thought in my mind beating in tune with my excited heart. We didn’t miss the arsenal this time. I was the arsenal too. I had exploded. I was t…
1954 · PDF PAGE 534
…e there are elements which resist our examination. We must raise ourselves to a plane in which we obtain complete control of such. It is found furthermore in the course of experiment that a great many of the apparent differences in our study conceal a hidden unity, and vice versa. Like every other science, both the subject and the object of the work increase as that work proceeds. Take a simple matter like Mathematics as our analogy. The schoolboy struggling with the Rule of Three is a very rudimentary image of the advanced mathematician workin…
1929 · PDF PAGE 29
…gating the circumstances, they sent for Champney without saying anything to me. I was taken over to my Uncle Tom's house one evening and found muyself penned in a corner of the room by the fulminating headmaster. The surprise terrified me and I did not dare to deny anything. But there was still no accusation made against me. Champney did not even tell my mother and Uncle Tom what I was supposed to have done. I was sent back to the school to serve the remainder of my sentence. At the end of that term, however, for some reason whose nature I cann…
1922 · PDF PAGE 177
…k here,’ he said in an eager whisper, ‘‘ we want some rooms in Soho. Some French or Italian place.” The man was equal to the problem. He found us a dirty dark little room on the ground floor in Greek Street. The landlady was some kind of Southerner with a dash of black blood. Her face told us that she was exactly the kind of woman we wanted. We paid the taxi. Cockie was very restless. He wanted to get the man to do what we wanted. He was itching all over, but he was afraid. We sat down on the bed, and began to make plans. August 21 I don’t reme…
1929 · PDF PAGE 55
…hing else seemed to me worth while but a thorough reading of the great minds of the past. I bought all the classical authors. Whenever I found a reference of one to another I hastened to order his works. I spent the whole of my time in reading. It was very rare that I got to bed before daylight. But I had a horror of being thought a "smug"; and what I was doing was a secret from my nearest friends. Whenever they were about I was playing chess and cards. In the daytime I went canoeing or cycling. I had no occupations which brought me into close …
1929 · PDF PAGE 569
… to act sensibly without imagining that the solar system would go to smash on account of his sexual explosions. At last even Los Angeles found him a nuisance. Lydia Yonska had taken pity on him at a time when he was desperately in need of money. He had shown his gratitude by pestering her with his unwelcome attentions, even climbing into her house at night through an open window and scaring her half out of her wits with frantic protestations and threats. She found herself obliged to protect herself. Dartnell wrote me a long letter abusing her. …
1929 · PDF PAGE 393
…farcically funny and all the dailies had anything up to three columns on the case. On the very day of publication, for the first time, I found myself famous and my work in demand. As a side issue, Mathers having claimed in court to be the Chief of the Rosicrucian Order, I was invaded by an innumerable concourse of the queerest imaginable people, each of whom independently asserted that he himself, and he alone, was that Chief. Having my own information on the subject, though communicating it to nobody else, I got rid of these pests as quickly a…
1910 · PDF PAGE 89
…o daves to will, will will to know, and knowing will keep silence; { for even to such as have entered the Supreme Order, there is no way found whereby they may break the stillness and communicate to those who have not ceased to hear.§ The guardian of the Temple is Adonai, he alone holds the key of the Portal, seek it of Him, for there is none other that can open for thee the door. Now to dare much is to will a little, so it comes about that though Hatha Yoga is the physical Yoga which teaches the aspirant how to control his body, yet is it also…
1910 · PDF PAGE 89
…o daves to will, will will to know, and knowing will keep silence; { for even to such as have entered the Supreme Order, there is no way found whereby they may break the stillness and communicate to those who have not ceased to hear.§ The guardian of the Temple is Adonai, he alone holds the key of the Portal, seek it of Him, for there is none other that can open for thee the door. Now to dare much is to will a little, so it comes about that though Hatha Yoga is the physical Yoga which teaches the aspirant how to control his body, yet is it also…
1930 · PDF PAGE 29
…se who accept the rewards of their émancipation for themselves are no longer within the Order. Members of the Order are each entitled to found Orders dépendent on themselves on the lines of the R. C. and G. D. orders, to cover types of émancipation and illumination not contemplated by the original (or main) System. Ail such orders must, however, be constituted in harmony with the A.*. A.*, as regards the essential principles. Ail members of the Order are in possession of the Word of the existing Aeon, and govern themselves thereby. They are ent…
1996 · PDF PAGE 88
Chapter II A Verses 2—5 89 3. In the sphere I am everywhere the centre, as she, the circumference, is nowhere found. Commentary: This is again interesting as throwing light on the thesis: “Every man and every woman is a star.” There is no place soever that is not a Centre of Light. This Truth is to be realized by direct perception, not merely by intellection. It is axiomatic; it cannot be demonstrated. It is to be assimilated by experience of the Vision of the “Star-Sponge.” 4. Yet she shall be known & I never. Commentary: See later, verse 13, …
1929 · PDF PAGE 548
…her own. She dropped the sword every time my eye was off her, but I always made her pick it up and do some more damage, till at last she found out that killing falsehoods, never so smiling and so like her idea of herself, did not hurt her, but on the contrary freed her, and she also found that the harder she struck at truth the stronger it stood. So in the end, she learnt the value of the critical spirit and made it one of her regular weapons. Besides this intellectual trouble she suffered from moral maladies of a similar sort. She had always t…
1922 · PDF PAGE 236
…the pieces up and burns them. I asked him about it; but he would say nothing, and got very angry. | I think I know what it is, though. I found a sheet of paper which he had forgotten to destroy—a letter to the War Office, warning them against German plots, and telling some things that have happened down here. I could hardly read it; his handwriting is absolutely gaga. He talks a great deal to himself. I overheard some of it. He thinks there may be a German spy in the War Office and is afraid to trust the post or telegraph. He kept on saying, “I…
1922 · PDF PAGE 353
…wrote the story of my adventures from the night of my meeting Lou to our return to England from Naples. But when the episode was over, I found the old despair of life as strong as ever. The will to live was really dead in me. But two evenings later King Lamus came to smoke a pipe with me on the terrace at sunset. In his hand was the Paradiso record which I had written. Sister Athena had typed it. ‘““ My dear man,” he said, “ what I can’t see is why
1929 · PDF PAGE 524
…ne and I had not realized the dirtiness of the intrigues against me. Well, he had his way and got out just one number. As soon as people found my name absent they would not buy it. Its sudden destruction was the greatest compliment I had ever received. During the three Chokmah days of my control of the paper I devoted every energy to proclaiming the Law of Thelma in its pages both directly and indirectly. My first important step in this direction, the thin end of the wedge, was an article "The Revival of Magick" which ran serially, ending in No…
1904 · PDF PAGE 6
…rse the case, but such harmony dwells far deeper than anything which we commonly intend by character. Such an expression of violences is found in the author of the following works. It is the custom to study, even if briefly, the life of a great writer from the biographical stand- point. In this case it is impossible to follow the usual course, for I have no wish to blast the useful public career of the most talented artist of our day, and there can be no doubt that precision of allu- sion would cause his innumerable friends to rec- [2]
1922 · PDF PAGE 20
…afé Wisteria in a sort of dull, angry stupor. Yet the only irritating incident of the day had been a letter from the lawyers which I had found at my club after flying from Norfolk to Barley Grange and motoring up to town. Mr. Wolfe had very sensibly advised me to make a settlement of a part of the estate, as against the event of my getting married; and there was some stupid hitch about getting trustees. I loathe law. It seems to me as if it were merely an elaborate series of obstacles to doing things sensibly. And yet, of course, after all, one…
1922 · PDF PAGE 186
…is essentially illusion; and the deeper one enters into one’s self the less one is influenced by such illusions. As the night went on, I found myself less and less disturbed by my own exquisite emotions. I felt myself dissolving deliciously into absence of interruption to the serenity of my soul.... I think writing this has reminded me of what I used to think was reality. It was time to go out and have lunch. The luxurious lethargy seems insuperable. .. . It isn’t hunger; it’s habit. Some instinct, some obscure and obscene recollection of the l…
1922 · PDF PAGE 230
… twice in rapid succession. Then it screamed, and ran to the house throwing away its gun. I wonder what it could be. September 20 I have found a manuscript in grandfather’s room that tells you how to invoke the Devil. It needs two people, and I don’t feel sure about Peter. He can’t see into the spiritual world at all. On the contrary, he is getting a little queer in the head, and imagines he sees things which don’t exist at all. He’s constantly scratching himself. He behaved very strangely at dinner. I think the butler noticed it. At midnight w…