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Page 1 of 21909 · PDF PAGE 40
…e answer avails him, and in its strength he is uplifted by his aspiration— and now he stands upright. Now then he makes a journey in his new house, and perceives at stated times, each time preceded by a new ordeal and equilibration, the forces that surround him. Death he sees, and the Life of Nature whose name is Sorrow, and the Word that quickeneth these, and his own self—and when he hath recognised these four in their true nature he passes to the altar once more and as the apex of a descending triangle is admitted to the lordship of the Doubl…
1909 · PDF PAGE 96
…. 94- THE EQUINOX St. john and his ₪258/?)?ושמthink af Adonai! Exactly: the one difficulty] My best way out will be to concentrate on the New Ritual, learn it perfectly by heart, work it at the right moment. . . . I will go, with this idea, to have a Citron presse; thence to my Secret Restaurant, and dine, always learning the Ritual. I will leave off the mantra, though it is nearly as much part of me as my head by now; and instead repeat over and over again the words of the Ritual so that I can do it in the end with perfect fluency and comprehens…
1909 · PDF PAGE 127
… arrived, and tried quite vainly to concentrate. Have risen, written a letter. Will break my fast— cafe croissant—and go a walk with the New Mantra, using my recently invented method of doing Prana— yarna on the march. The weather is again perfect. Breakfast—~eaten Yogin-wise—at an end. The walk begins. The walk over. Kept mantra going well enough. 125
1909 · PDF PAGE 91
…e been almost in- supportable. I was never so far, and never so near . . . But the hour approaches. Let me collect myself, and begin the new day in affirmation of my Unity with my Lord Adonai I The Eighth Day Thus the Eighth day, the Second Week, begins. I am in Asana. For some reason or other, Pranayarna is quite easy. Concentrating on Adonai, Iwas in Kam- bhakham for a whole minute without distress. It is true, by the way. I was—and am—in some danger of looking on this Record as a Book; i.e., of emphasising things for their literary effect, a…
1909 · PDF PAGE 112
…e, that at the Beginning of the Tenth Day—and Ten are the Holy Sephiroth, the Emanations of the Crown ; Blessed be He! . . . He may make new considerations of this Operation whereby he may discover through what error he is thus betrayed again and again into failure. Failure. Failure. The Temple is closed. Now then, Ο Lord Adonai! Let the Tenth Day be favourable unto 0. Mi For in the struggle he is as nothing worth. Nor valiant, nor fortunate, nor skilful —except Thou fight by his side, cover his breast with Thy shield, second his blows with Thy …
1909 · PDF PAGE 42
…lf-balanced by my impenetrable calm." I have spent half an hour wandering in the Musée du Luxembourg. I now sit down to meditate on this new ritual. The following, so it appears, should be the outlines— damn it, I’ve a good mind to write it straight off—no! I’ll be patient and tease the Spirit a little. I will be coquettish as a Spanish catamite. I. Death summons Life and clears away all other forces. 2. The Invocation of the Word. Death consecrates Life, who in her whirling dance invokes that Word. 3. They salute the Word. The Signs and M M mu…
1909 · PDF PAGE 59
… ; also {or some photographs illustrating some of the more absurd positions, for the instruction of my devotees. I must now copy out the new Ritual. This, you will readily perceive, is all wrong. Theoreti- cally, everything should be ready by the beginning of the Operation; and one should simply do it and be done with it. But this is a very shallow view. One never knows what may be required; i.e., a beginner like myself doesn’t. Further, one cannot write an effective Ritual till one is already in a fairly exalted state . . . and so On. We must …
1909 · PDF PAGE 46
… been. I had better take a solid hour willing the Tryst with Adonai. Have done all this, and a Work of Kindness. I will again revise the new ritual, dine, return and copy it fair for use. Let Adonai the Lord oversee the Work, that it be per- fect, a sure link with Him, a certain and infallible Conjuration, and Spell, and Working of true Magick Art, that I may invoke Him with success whenever seemeth good unto Him. Unto Him; not unto Me! Is it not written that Except Adonai build the House, they labour in vain that build it? Chez Lavenue. Not fe…
1909 · PDF PAGE 89
…—VI with the Rituals of the five Grades. [From Dr. Dee‘s and the G. '. D. '. MSS.—ED.] 5. Invocation of Thoth. 6. (No: I will not use the New Ritual, not will I discuss the matter.) An impromptu invoca- tion of Adonai. 7. Closing formulae. Το work, then ! The ceremony went well enough; the forces invoked came readily and visibly; Thoth in particularas friendly as ever—I fancy He takes this record as a compliment to Him—He’s welcome to it, poor God! The L.V.X. came, too; but not enough to pierce the awful shroud of darkness that by my folly I hav…
1909 · PDF PAGE 98
…th Blood and Flame, I cannot even remain concen- trated in humiliation, which yet I feel so acutely. What a wormy worm I am! I tried the new strict Siddhasana, only to find that Ι had hurt myself so this morningwith it that I cannot hear it at all, even with the pillow to support the instep. I will just try and do alittle Pranayama, to see ifI can
1909 · PDF PAGE 44
…me notably ; while doing this magic it is like so much water. A “transvaluation of all valuesl ” Over a citron pressé I have revised the new Ritual. Also I have bought suitable materials for copying it fair; and this I did without solemnity or ceremonial,
1909 · PDF PAGE 55
… I can think of is this; that there is (I can't be sure about it) no rational connection between the thought one left behind one and the new thought. In a simple wandering during the practice of concentration one can very nearly always (especially with a little experience) trace the chain. With neigh- bourhood-concentration this is not 50. Perhaps there is a chain, but so great already is the power of prevent- ing the impressions from rising into consciousness that one has no knowledge of the links, each one having been automatically slaughtere…
1909 · PDF PAGE 105
…derstand how tremendous a task is that of the postulant, since he has to glorify and initiate all his principles and train them to their new and superior tasks. This surely explains better the terrible dangers of the path. . . . Some years back, 011 the Red River in China, John St. John saw at every corner of that swift and dangerous stream a heap of wreckage. . . . He, himself in danger, thought ofhis magical career. Alcoholism, insanity, disease, faddism, death, knavery, prison—every earthly hell, reflection of some spiritual blunder, had seiz…
1909 · PDF PAGE 120
3.40. 4.10. 118 THE EQUINOX One might justly object to any Results of this Ten days’ strain. But if abundant health and new capacity to do great work be the after—effect, who then will dare to cast a stone? Not that it matters a turnip—top to the Adept himself. But others may be deterred from entering the Path by the foolish talk of the ignorant, and thus may flowers be lost that should go to make the fadelesswreath of Adonai. Ah, Lord, pluck me up utterly by the root, and set that which Thou pluckest as a flower upon Thy brow! Walked back to the…
1909 · PDF PAGE 13
…cen- trating my will upon the Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel. Then I struCk Twelve times upon the Bell ; with the new month the Operation was duly begun. Oct. 1. The First Day At Eight o’clock I rose from sleep and putting on my Robe, began a little to meditate. For several reasons— the journey and business of the day before, etc. etc., I did not feel fresh. But forcing myself a little I rose II
1909 · PDF PAGE 23
JOHN ST. JOHN worm I gave up, and tried playing the fool; got amused by the New Monster, but did not perform the “Vajroli Mudra.” [For this see the Shiva Sanhita, and other of the Holy Sanskrit Tantras.—ED.] However, having got rid of her for the moment, one may continue. 10.24— Py. [Prana Yama.—Ed.] 14 cycles. Some effort re- Io.39. quired ; sweating appears to have stopped and Bhuchari hardly begun, My head really aches a good deal. I must add one or two remarks, In my walk I dis- covered that my mantra Hua allahu, etc., really belongs to the…
1909 · PDF PAGE 93
…soundest sleepers imaginable. Nine solid hours without turning once is my irreducible minimum. Having done an hour’s illumination of the New Ritual, will go and break my fast with coffee and a brioche, and thence proceed to Michael Brenner’s studio. I have spent the morning in modelling Siddhasana— a more difficult task than appeared. Rather like THE taskl But I went on with the mantra, and made some Re- flections upon Kamma. I will now have a Yogin coffee and sandwich, and return to my illumination of the Ritual. In the desert of my soul, where …
1909 · PDF PAGE 82
…ple commonly call poison or no. In short, I act like a sensible man; and I think I deserve every credit for introducingthis com- pletely new idea into religion. That function of my brain which says “You ought to be willing Adonai ” sometimes acts. But I am willing Him! It is so active because all this week it has been working hard, and doesn’t realise that its work is done. Just as a retired grocer wakes up and thinks “ I must go and open the shop.” In Hindu phrase, the thought-stuff, painfully forced all these days into one channel, has acquir…
1909 · PDF PAGE 80
…an the other notes at intervals Again awake, and patient-eager. The dreams flow through me ceaselessly. This time a house where Ι, like a new Bluebeard, have got to conceal my wives from each other. But my foolish omission to knife them brings it about that I have thirty—nine secret chambers, and only one open one in each case. Oh, yards of it! And all sorts of people come in to supper—which there isn’t any, and we have to do all sorts of shifts—and all the wives think themselves neglected-as they are bound to do, if one is insane enough to have…
1909 · PDF PAGE 68
…Ritual until it is beautifully coloured. As Zoroaster saith : “ God is never so much turned away from man, and never so much sendeth him new paths, as when he maketh ascent to divine speculations or works, in a confused or disordered manner, and (as the oracle adds) with unhallowed lips, or unwashed feet. For of those who are thus