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Page 1 of 21909 · PDF PAGE 122
…on, and concentrate on a simple Magical Progress. The Next Step for humanity in general was then “ the Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel.” One thing at a time. But here he finds himself discussing and disputing with himself the nature of that Knowledge. Better far act as hitherto, and aspire simply and directly, as one person'to another, careless of the critical objec- tions (quite insuperable, of course) to this or any other conception. For as this experience transcends reason, it is fruitless to argue about it. Adonai, I in…
1909 · PDF PAGE 112
11.14. 11.49. 110 THE EQUINOX The Vision of the Holy Guardian Angel itself; yet was He seen as from afar, not intimately. . . , Therefore is 0. M. not content with all this wonder; but will now orderly close the temple, that at the Beginning of the Tenth Day—and Ten are the Holy Sephiroth, the Emanations of the Crown ; Blessed be He! . . . He may make new considerations of this Operation whereby he may discover through what error he is thus betrayed again and again into failure. Failure. Failure. The Temple is closed. Now then, Ο Lord Adonai! L…
1909 · PDF PAGE 12
THE EQUINOX bone. I took also the magical knife, and the holy Anointing Oil of Abramelin the Mage. I began then quite casually by performing the Lesser Banishing Ritual of the Pentagram, finding to my great joy and some surprise that the Pentagrams instantly formulated themselves, visible to the material eye as it were bars of shining blackness deeper than the night. I then consecrated myself to the Operation; cutting the Tonsure upon my head, a circle, as it were to admit the light of infinity: and cutting the cross of blood upon my breast, thus…
1909 · PDF PAGE 62
12.5. 12.15. 12.35. 12.45. 60 THE EQUINOX Holy Illuminated Man of God our Greatly Honoured Prater, O.M., Adeptus Exemptus 7°=4° Brother-Elect of the Most Secret and Sublime Order A A He does with great difficulty (and no interior perform— ance) just four breath-cycles. Somebody once remarked that it had taken a hundred million years to produce me ; I may add that I hope it will be another hundred million before God makes such another cur. Have performed the Equilibrating Ritual of the Scourge, the Dagger, and the Chain; with the Holy Anointing O…
1909 · PDF PAGE 106
…holds his course. Adonail Adonai! is not the harbour yet in sight? He has returned home and burnt (as every night since its arrival) the holy incense of Abramelin the Mage. The atmosphere is full of vitality, sweetened and strengthened; the soul naturally and simply turns to the holy task with vigour and confidence; the black demons of doubt and despair flee away; one respires already a foretaste of the Perfume, and obtains almost a premonition 01 the Vision. So, let the work go 0111 7 Breath—cycles, rather difficult. Clothes are a nuisance, and m…
1909 · PDF PAGE 35
JOHN ST. JOHN 12.15. magick knife; I smart from the heat of the Holy Oil; I am bruised by the scourge of Osiris that hath so cruelly smitten me; the perfume yet fills the chamber of Art ;—and 1? Oh Adonai my Lord, surely I did invoke Thee with fervour; yet Thou camest not utterly to the tryst. And yet I know that Thou wast there; and it may be that the morning may bring remembrance of Thee which this consciousness does not now contain. But I swear by Thine own glory that I will not be satisfied with this, that I will go on even unto madness and d…
1909 · PDF PAGE 130
…eration is (among other things) an attempt to prove the proposition : Reward is the direct and immediate consequence of Work. Of all the holy illuminated Men of God of my acquaintance, I am the only one that holds this opinion. But I think that this Record, when I have time to go through it, and stand at some distance, to get the per— spective, will be proved a conclusive proof of my thesis. I think that every failure will be certainly traceable to my own dam foolishness; every little success to courage, skill, wit, tenacity. IfI had but a litt…
1909 · PDF PAGE 59
…ust as I always live in order to get a definite piece of work done: concentrating as it were 017 the Work. As Levi also adjures us by the Holy Names. Coming back from lunch (a dozen Marennes Vertes and an Andouillette aux Pommes) I met Zelina Visconti, more lovely-ugly than ever in her wild way. She says that she is favourably disposed towards me, on the recommendation of her concierge ! l! " The tongue of good report hath already been heard in his favourl Advance, free and of good report! ” 57
1909 · PDF PAGE 135
… And there were revealed unto me certain Words of Power . . . And I invoked my Lord and recited the Book Ararita at the Altar . . . This holy inspired book (delivered unto me in the winter of last year) was now at last understanded of me; for it is, though I knew it not, a complete scheme of this Operation. For this cause I will add this book Ararita at the end of the Manuscript. [This has not been permitted. The Book Ararita will be issued by the Α.“. Α:. in due course—En] I also demanded of mine Angel the Writing upon the Lamen of Silver; 21 …
1909 · PDF PAGE 75
…at I am not going to be content with what would content them. In other words, I am going to de ne " the Knowledge and Conversation of my holy Guardian Angel " as equal to Neroda-Samapatti, the trance of Nibbana. I hope I shall be able to live up to this! Have been practising Asana, etc. I forgot one thing in the last entry: I had been reproaching Adonai that for six days I had evoked Him in vain. . . . I got the reply, “ The Seventh Day shall be the Sabbath of the Lord thy God.” So mote it be! T/æ Seven/ll Day. I began this great day with Eight…
1909 · PDF PAGE 36
…t ritual be a constant and perfect link between Us . . . so that at all times I may be perfect in Thy Knowledge and Conversation, Ο mine Holy Guardian Angel! to whom I have aspired these ten years past. And though as it may seem I now compose myself to sleep, I await Thee . . . I await Thee! I arise from sleep, mine eyes a little weary, my soul fresh, my heart restored.
1909 · PDF PAGE 78
Ι 2.43. 1.25. 76 THE EQUINOX Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel is only to be performed when the Magus has rowed himself completely out; in the language of the Tarot, when the Magus has become the Fool. But for my faith in the Ritual DCLXXI. I should be at the end of my spells. Well? We shall see in the upshot. I really almost begin to believe IT will happen. For I lay down quite free of worry or anxiety (hugging myself, as it were), perfectly sure of Him in the simple non-assertive way that a child is sure of its mother, in …
1909 · PDF PAGE 52
…e Moon—Ray unto the Ineffable Crown? Modesty is misplaced here! Very good. Then how aspire? Who is it that standeth in the Moon-Ray? The Holy Guardian Angel. Aye! Ο my Lord Adonai, Thou art the Beginning and the End of the Path. For as Thou?התאthou art also 406 =?ותTau the material world, the Omega. And as He mn Thou art 12, the rays of the Ineffable Crown. (A disaster has occurred; viz., a sudden and violent attack of that which demands a tabloid of Pepsin, Bis- muth, and Charcoal—and gets it. On my return, [1.34, I continue.) And as?ינאAni “I…
1909 · PDF PAGE 13
… that Third Eye, I strove to shut in unto an ever narrowing sphere by concen- trating my will upon the Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel. Then I struCk Twelve times upon the Bell ; with the new month the Operation was duly begun. Oct. 1. The First Day At Eight o’clock I rose from sleep and putting on my Robe, began a little to meditate. For several reasons— the journey and business of the day before, etc. etc., I did not feel fresh. But forcing myself a little I rose II
1909 · PDF PAGE 23
…ying the fool; got amused by the New Monster, but did not perform the “Vajroli Mudra.” [For this see the Shiva Sanhita, and other of the Holy Sanskrit Tantras.—ED.] However, having got rid of her for the moment, one may continue. 10.24— Py. [Prana Yama.—Ed.] 14 cycles. Some effort re- Io.39. quired ; sweating appears to have stopped and Bhuchari hardly begun, My head really aches a good deal. I must add one or two remarks, In my walk I dis- covered that my mantra Hua allahu, etc., really belongs to the Visuddhi Cakkram; so I allowed the thought…
1909 · PDF PAGE 136
…ing kindle itself into a Kiss—and I perceived I34 the true Sacraments—and I beheld in one moment all the mystic visions in one ; and the Holy Graal appeared unto me, and many other inexpressible things were known of me. Also I was given to enjoy the subtle Presence of my Lord interiorly during the whole of this twelfth day. Then Ι besought the Lord that He would take me into His presence eternally even now. But He withdrew Himself, for that I must do that which I was sent hither to do; namely, to rule the earth. Therefore with sweetness ineffab…
1909 · PDF PAGE 7
…r set of people will find another disappoint~ ment. I am hardly an heroic figure. I am not The Good Young Man That Died. Ido not remain in holy meditation, balanced on my left eyelash, for forty years, restoring ex- hausted nature by a single grain of rice at intervals of several months. You will perceive in these pages a man with all his im- perfections thick upon him trying blindly, yet with all his force, to control the thoughts of his mind, 50 that he shall be able to say ”I will think this thought and not that thought” at any moment, as easi…
1909 · PDF PAGE 72
… arrived from London; and I feel its magical effects most favourable. Ο creature of Incense! I conjure thee by Him that sitteth upon the Holy Throne and liveth and reigneth for ever as the Balance of Righteousness and Truth, that thou comfort and exalt my soul with Thy sweet perfume, that I may be utterly devoted to this Work of the Invocation of my Lord Adonai, that I may fully attain thereto, beholding Him face to face—as it is written “ Before there was Equilibrium, Countenance beheld not Countenance ”—yea, being utterly absorbed in His inef…
1909 · PDF PAGE 32
…At least, I now solemnly express a pious wish that the Crocodile of the West may eat up the Sun once and for all, that Set may defile the Holy Place, that the supreme Blasphemy may be spoken by Python in the ears of Isis. I want trouble. I want to say Indra’s mantram till his throne gets red-hot and burns his lotus-buttocks ; I want to pinch little Harpocrates till he fairly yells . . . and I will too! Somehow! I have now got into a sort of smug content, grinning all over like some sleepy Chinese god. No reason for it, Lord knows! I can’t make u…
1909 · PDF PAGE 76
…h. There was a certain Darwesh whose turban a thief stole. But when they said to him, “ See ! he hath taken the road to Damascus !" that holy man answered, as he went quietly to the cemetery, “I will await him here ! " So, therefore, there is one place, O thou thief of my heart’s love, Adonai, to which Thou must come at last ; and that place is the tomb in which lie buried all my thoughts and emotions, all that which is “ I, and Me, and Mine.” There will I lay myself and await thee, even as our Father Christian Rosenkreutz that laid himself in …