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shifty Joe --- but a boy. (I was twelve years old and quite ignorant of all sexual matters till long 
after.) Also I had "held a mock prayer meeting". This I remembered. I had strolled up to a group of 
boys in the playground, who were indeed holding one. As they saw me one said, "Brother Crowley 
will now lead us in prayer." Brother Crowley was too wary and walked away. But instead of doing 
what a wise boy would have done: gone straight to the head and accused them of forty-six distinct 
unmentionable crimes, I let things slide. So, fearing that I might go, they hurried off themselves and 
told him how that wicked Crowley had tried to lead them away from Jesus. 
Worse, I had called Page I a pharisee. That was true; I had said it. Dreadful of me! And Page I, who 
"walked very close to Jesus", of course went and told. 
Yes, they all walked very close to Jesus --- as close as Judas did. 
4. A boy named Barton was sentenced to one hundred and twenty strokes of the cane on his bare 
shoulders, for some petty theft of which he was presumably innocent. 
Superb was the process of trial. It began by an extra long prayer time and Joshua's account of the 
sin of Achan, impressively read. Next, an hour or two about the Lord's care of the school, the way 
He brought sin to light. Next, when well worked up and all our nerves on the jump, who stole what? 
Silence. Next, the Lord's care in providing a witness --- like the witnesses against Naboth! Then the 
witness and his story, as smooth as a policeman's. Next, sentence. Last, execution, with intervals of 
prayer! 
Champney's physique being impaired, one may suppose by his excessive devotion to Jesus, he 
arranged to give sixty strokes one day and sixty the next. 
My memory fails --- perhaps Barton will one day oblige with his reminiscences --- but I fancy the 
first day came so near to killing him that he escaped the second. 
I remember one licking I got --- on the legs, because flogging the buttocks excites the victim's 
sensuality! --- fifteen minutes prayer, fifteen strokes of the cane, fifteen minutes more prayer, 
fifteen more strokes --- and more prayer to top it! 
5. On Sunday the day was devoted to "religion". Morning prayers and sermon (about forty-five 
minutes). Morning "meeting" (one and 
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a half to two hours). Open-air preaching on Parker's Piece1 (say one hour). Bible reading and 
learning by heart. Reading of the few books "sanctioned for Sunday" (say two hours). Prayer meeting 
(called voluntary, but to stay away meant that some sneak in the school would accuse you of 
something next day) (say one hour). Evening prayer and sermon (say thirty minutes). Preaching of 
the gospel in the meetingroom (one and a half hours). Ditto on Parker's Piece (say one hour). Prayer 
before retiring (say half an hour). 
6. The "Badgers': meeting". Every Monday night the school was ranged round the back of the big 
schoolroom, and the scourgings of Barnswell (Cambridge's slum) let in, fed, preached to and 
dismissed. 
Result, epidemics of ringworm, measles and mumps. 
Oh no! Not a result; the Lord's hand was heavy upon us because of some undiscovered sin. 
I might go on for a long while, but I will not. I hope there are some people in the world happy 
enough to think that I am lying, or at least exaggerating. But I pledge my word to the literal truth of 
all I have said, and there are plenty of witnesses alive to confirm me, or to refute me. I have given 
throughout the actual names, addresses and other details.