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1909 · CLOSE READING

John St. John

John St. John (1909), PDF p. 75

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11.30. 11.55. 12.17. JOHN ST. JOHN This is of course (nearly enough) another way of expressing the Hindu Meditation whose method is to kill all thoughts as they arise in the mind. The difference is that I am aiming at a target, while they are preventing arrows from striking one. In my aspiration to know Adonai, I resemble their Yogis who concentrate on their “ personal Lord "; but at the same time it must be remembered that I am not going to be content with what would content them. In other words, I am going to de ne " the Knowledge and Conversation of my holy Guardian Angel " as equal to Neroda-Samapatti, the trance of Nibbana. I hope I shall be able to live up to this! Have been practising Asana, etc. I forgot one thing in the last entry: I had been reproaching Adonai that for six days I had evoked Him in vain. . . . I got the reply, “ The Seventh Day shall be the Sabbath of the Lord thy God.” So mote it be! T/æ Seven/ll Day. I began this great day with Eight breath—cycles; was stopped by the indigestion trouble in its other form. (P.S.—Evidently the introduction of the Cascara into my sensitive aura made its action instantaneous.) My breathing passages were none too clear, either ; I have evidently taken a chill. Now, O my Lord Adonai, thou Self-Glittering One, wilt Thou not manifest unto Thy chosen one? For see 73
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