John St. John

THE EQUINOX 3.41. Began again. I shall take " Hua allalu alazi lailaha illa hua” for mantra [any sacred sentence, whose con- stant repetition produces many strange effects upon the mind.——ED.] if I want one, or : may Adonai reveal unto me a special mantra to invoke Him! 3.51. Broke down again, mantra and all. 352- Went on meditating in “ Hanged Man posture " [Legs 4.14. crossed, arms below head, like the figure of the Hanged Man in the Tarot Gards.—BD.] to formulate sacrifice and pain self—inflicted; for I feel such a worm, able only to remain a few minutes at a time in a position long since“ conquered." For this reason too I cut again the Cross of Blood ; and now a third time will I do it. And I will take out the Magical Knife and sharpen it yet more, so that this body may fear me ; for that I am Horus the terrible, the Avenger, the Lord of the Gate of the West. 4.15— Read Ritual DCLXXI. [The nature of this Ritual is 4.30. explained later.—ED.] 5.10. I have returned from my shopping. Strange how 14 solemn and dignified so trivial a thing becomes, once one has begun to concentrate l I bought two pears, half a pound of Garibaldi biscuits, and a packet of Gaufrettes. I hada Citron presse, too, at the Dome. At the risk of violating the precepts of Zoroaster 170 and 144 I propose to do a Tarot divination for this Operation. ᾽