John St. John

9. 20. 9.30- 11.17. 136 THE EQUINOX sion of their sum with the all, that transcends the deadly opposites ; change which implies decay,stability which spells monotony. I understand all the Psalms of Benediction; there is spontaneous praise, a fountain in my heart. The authors of the Psalms must have known something of this Illumination when they wrote them. It seems, too, that this Operation is transformed. I suppose it must read as a patchwork of most inhar- monious colour, a thing without continuityor cohesion. Το me, now, it appears from the very start a simple direct progress in one straight line. I can hardly remember that there were checks. Of course my rational memory picking out details finds otherwise. But I seem to have two memories almost as if belonging to two strata of being. In Qabalastic language, my native consciousness is now Neschamah, not Ruach or Nephesch. . . . I really cannot write more. This writing is a descent into Ruach, and I want to abide where I am. At 10.0 arrived at Brenner’s studio, and took the pose, At once, automatically, the interior trembling began agam,: and again the subtle brilliance flowed through me. The consciousness again died and was reborn as the divine, always without shock or stress. How easy is magic, once the way is found! How still is the soul! The turbid spate of emotion has ceased; the heavy particles of thought have sunk