John St. John

4.53. 6.7. י6.23 6.3L 104 THE EQUINOX not hopelessly, not fearfully, but with an abiding certainty that he would endure unto the end. And now ? In this great Magical Retirement he has struck many rocks, sprung many leaks ; the waters of the False Sea foam over the bow, ride and carry the quarter—is he perchance already wrecked, his hopeless plight con- cealed from him as yet by his own darkness? For, dazzled as he is by the blinding brilliance of this morning’s Spiritual Sun, which yet he beheld but darkly, to him now even the light of earth seems dark. Reason the rudder was long since unshipped; the power 01 his personality has broken down, yet under the tiny storm-sail 01 his Will to Adonai, the crazy bark holds way, steered by the car of Discipline— Yea, he holds his course. Adonail Adonai! is not the harbour yet in sight? He has returned home and burnt (as every night since its arrival) the holy incense of Abramelin the Mage. The atmosphere is full of vitality, sweetened and strengthened; the soul naturally and simply turns to the holy task with vigour and confidence; the black demons of doubt and despair flee away; one respires already a foretaste of the Perfume, and obtains almost a premonition 01 the Vision. So, let the work go 0111 7 Breath—cycles, rather difficult. Clothes are a nuisance, and make all the difference. John St. John is more broken up by this morning's