1909 · CLOSE READING
The Soldier and the Hunchback ! and ?
The Soldier and the Hunchback ! and ? (1909), PDF p. 15
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THE SOLDIER AND THE HUNCHBACK
in Gibraltar—back to Dorothy at the earliest possible moment.
Sandwiches of bun and German sausage may be vulgar and
even imaginary—it’s the taste I like. And the more I munch,
the more complacent I feel, until I go so far as to offer my
critics a bite.
This sounds in a way like the “ Interior Certainty ” of the
common or garden Christian; but there are differences.
The Christian insists on notorious lies being accepted as
an essential part of his (more usually her) system; I, on the
contrary, ask for facts, for observation. Under Scepticism,
true, one is just as much a house of cards as the other; but
only in the philosophical sense.
Practically, Science is true; and Faith is foolish.
Practically, 3 x 1 = 3 is the truth; and 3x 1 =1 isa lie;
though, sceptically, both statements may be false or unintelli-
gible.
Practically, Franklin’s method of obtaining fire from
heaven is better than that of Prometheus or Elijah. I am
now writing by the light that Franklin’s discovery enabled
men to use.
Practically, “I concentrated my mind upon a white radiant
triangle in whose centre was a shining eye, for 22 minutes
and 10 seconds, my attention wandering 45 times” is a
scientific and valuable statement. ‘I prayed fervently to the
Lord for the space of many days ” means anything or nothing.
Anybody who cares to do so may imitate my experiment and
compare his result with mine. In the latter case one would
always be wondering what “fervently” meant and who “the
Lord” was, and how many days made “ many.”
My claim, too, is more modest than the Christian’s. He
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